Parenthood

Does it ever end?

Just when you think your children have grown up and are independent, they sometimes come back to you for help in all ways be it emotional or otherwise. This is especially so if you have daughters or when you are a daughter.

In Lisa See's 'Snow Flower And The Secret Fan' where the story line is steep in Chinese culture and beliefs, there was an extract that stayed with me for many days...We are ordered to love our in-laws, but we enter those families as strangers, as the lowest person in the household, just one step on the ladder above a servant...God forbid it to be true... We love our parents because they take care of us, but we women are considered worthless branches on the family tree. We drain the family resources. We are raised by one family for another... Oh don't they sound so long ago?
I am glad I have a set of parents who think otherwise. They love their girls as much as their boys and at times I feel even more. Perhaps they have this strong protective instincts over their daughters and make sure they go to school long enough to have a good career. My mother always says that girls should be educated as well as possible so that their position in the homes of the in-laws is regarded kindly. That's thumbs up for a lady who has only been to school for only 3 short years but yet knew the power of education.

My father though a full 94, is still bright enough to give me advice very often. Just last weekend I was again enlightened by his thoughts. On the lift down he told me this :

" Poh, I am already an old man. You know, I have this fiery temperament and a loudness that scare people away at times. Your sister tells me to read God's words everyday; page by page. I have learnt that God says not to be too unruly and that I must change to be more gentle and docile. I must also not react towards others' attitudes towards me but to respond. If people are unkind to me, I must not react unkindly. I must learn to be more forgiving and love. You should know the Word more than I do. Always be willing to love."

Wow, was I glad to hear from my father's mouth? I am most pleased as he was quoting from the Word and understanding it. Most of all he was humble enough to recognize his weakness. I enjoy this conversation with him. I see how my father evolves through the years and becoming so loving and broadminded.

My father belongs to the era of long ago...even all insurance companies refuse to allow him to buy an insurance when he flies; to the era of the songstress named Zhou Hsuan. So, spending the weekend in his shop in town, I played this song to his delight. He asked me how I could play from the PC. I told him U tube and he grinned at me as he hummed along.

Don't be alarmed when you listen to this... my banana daughters are bound to faint.

Old, isn't it? But old is gold.